Journal

Heret Herot

March 25, 2019

It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that you don’t. I’m just following your lead. / When you came to me with your worth, put it in my hands / and asked me how to read it / it was like watching Jesus, asking if I still believed in Him / just because He flipped a table. / Your body remembers the soundtrack to your past life. / It remembers the next life coming. Some things you don’t have to ask. / Don’t be scared of the voice in your head that’s kindly been calling you God / even if it reads like a map to the Minotaur / written in rats and wine. / Luckily dignity, like a lung, is regenerative if you stop sucking tar pits into it. / One day, we’ll look back on all this pain like a parent we were obligated to love. / You’ll be glad you did. Love each one. / Don’t suffer until you have to. Pay attention and you won’t have to.

Excerpt from Heret Herot in the new book, A Choir of Honest Killers (September 2019, @writebloodypublishing ).

Billy Joe Shaver

March 21, 2019

Found this last night digging through photos. A handwritten letter from Billy Joe Shaver, October 1996. If you know who that is and are a fan, you can imagine the awe in my smile catching the eyes popping outta my face. Billy Joe Shaver’s Tramp On Your Street album was the one thing my dad and I ever bonded over. Aside from Pancho’s Mexican Buffet.

I was writing country songs at the time, in college, and had nine of them taken to Nashville by a guy named Kevin Hutchins who’d won at the Texas Opry 3 years in a row. We started with a song called Never Liked Mornings [Til I Woke Up Next to You] and I got a cassette recording out of it, but have no recollection what happened to it, or the rest of the songs. Or Kevin.

I was pretty confident the night Shaver came to Houston. I tracked Billy Joe down behind the venue, shook his somewhat fingerless hand and gave him a few songs. This letter arrived the next week. I would like to pass on the contents of it to anyone who has ever sent me a poem.

Serenity Place Social Rehab

March 12, 2019

College, Stop getting married and having babies.
Trying to get work done. No, but seriously.

Plot twist

February 26, 2019

A welcome one.

Next

February 13, 2019

Like arson’s who’ve quit setting fire to shit,
or people who hate candles,
or anyone trying to light their cigarette in a chemical plant—
Escape rooms = no match, not for this crew.

With @derrickbrownpoetry and @cardioid_music.

The truth about strength

February 12, 2019

Thank you and I’m sorry are the gateway words to vulnerability.
Vulnerability made every movie, sang every song
and wrote every poem that ever plugged a life back into itself.

Embroidered photo @gintarespasaka

Excerpt

February 11, 2019

I want to play a role in a movie where I get to act so gay I can finally relax.

An Advocation

January 24, 2019

Luckily, like lungs, dignity is regenerative if you stop sucking tar pits into it.

The Voyage L.A. Interview

January 23, 2019

How I got my start and where I’m at today:
(click on photo)

MUKGA

January 22, 2018

Headed back out on the [wrong side of the] road May 12-23
with this dude, @andrewgibby, to make the U.K. great again.

straight up in bed

January 19, 2019

Hey, can someone with experience in dream analysis tell me what it means when a giant nipple-penis grows out of my stomach and I tug on it and my chest splits open til I pull up a baby attached to a couple plastic tubes and covered in orange marmalade? Am having trouble googling it. My best guess is that I’m either aborting the past, or my inner child wants toast.

Jean Heath

January 18, 2019

Get these people out of my house.
I’ve never died before, and I’m gonna enjoy it.

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