Reply To: Week 3 Posts – December 5th

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#19142
Anonymous

i love the title, it pulls me in. my biggest note would be to be cautious about repetitive words. they can serve a purpose, but the words collapse, appetite, pilgrimage, hubris, — wait, i just realized this is a sestina. i get it. i don’t know much about how to critique this format, but what i can say is that as the reader, the six words you’ve landed on are meaty words that resonate as complex and thus as they repeat they become a bit jarring. i’d suggest giving hubris and pilgrimage a break and leaning into other word choices that don’t bang against the mind so aggressively. again though, i’m not at all scholarly enough to review a sestina, they are challenging to write. thank you for sharing.